Thursday, 17 July 2014

The day before..

This week has been a week of preparation, finalising plans and goodbyes as tomorrow is the day I actually get on the plane to Thailand. It seems so weird to think that all the fundraising and planning has finally come to an end, and I'm about to jet off around the world. This morning I packed my suitcase and backpack, printed my boarding pass and now have a few hours to relax before heading out for an evening meal with my family.

I have been overwhelmed by generosity this week, given by my friends.  I have been treated to a coffee date, dinner and tickets to see Wicked the musical (which is my favourite, ever musical), cards from work colleagues, and hourly reassuring phone calls and skype conversations. Each one bringing enjoyment and encouragement, of which means so much to me!

I have also spent the majority of my week accompanied by crippling anxiety, often keeping me awake at night. Flying alone is something that scares the living daylights out of me, and it is something I have to do tomorrow. 

What if I get lost? What if I miss my flight and get stranded? What if?

Well, what if? It's highly unlikely really, especially as I'm one of the most organised perfectionists to walk on this planet. I have been reminding myself that if I let fear ruin everything, this is the life I will always have. I have a good life but there is always something bigger and better out there. The world is a huge place, with so much to experience and see.. I can't confine myself to the same, safe places. 

I sit here this afternoon, both scared and excited, and it's my choice as to which emotion I allow to take over. Right now, I am unbelievably excited for tomorrow. After all, life begins at the end of your comfort zone..

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