Thursday, 2 May 2013

Year One Complete

This morning, I sat my final exam for this year, achieving a respectable 80%. The perfectionist within me is still disappointed but overall, I am happy :-)
I really don't know where the year has gone. It only seems like 5 minutes that I was arriving with suitcases to move in. That timid, vulnerable girl embarking on a new chapter in life, a life away from home with the freedom to either become consumed even more by my illness or choose to start living and recovering. The choice to recover has to be the best choice I have ever made.
So much has changed over the past year. It's weird to think that this time last year, I was sitting my A-Levels, barely able to lift my head up due to lack of energy. I was toying with the idea of postponing Uni because I knew I'd never cope. Lectures, assignments, part time work and then learning to live alone seemed impossible. It's difficult for the average person, let alone someone who is slowly destroying themselves. 
When I look back on this past academic year, I realize how much I have grown. Moving out, travelling across the country to meet friends, booking a holiday, joining yoga, gaining a stone - these are all things that I have to be proud of. I'm not there yet but I am starting to live my life again. 
My outlook on life has completely changed. I am learning to embrace the present and live in the moment. If I want more moments, then I have to be strong and healthy, not tired, weak and skeletal. My aim in life isn't the the thinnest person any more. It is to enjoy what I have and who I am. I may not fully like myself yet, but I will never be anyone else, so I have to accept and like this. I have met so many people this year, many of which have had a huge impact on my confidence. For this, I will be eternally grateful.
I am off home in 12 days and I am going to enjoy my summer. Recovery focused and friend orientated!

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4 comments

turneachpage said...

I am so proud of you! You are winning this fight and earning your future xxx

Tanya Beetham said...

You have come a long way - it's important to give yourself credit :)

victoriagiggles said...

So proud of you! Not only have you completed a year but you've achieved so much in it. :) You're nearly there & you're starting to enjoy the joys life can bring! Love it. xxxx

Josie said...

You've come so far in a year, you should be massively proud of yourself...I'm proud of you! Hopefully your summer will be fabulous, you deserve it! xxx

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