Thursday, 13 December 2012

Blogmas day 13: Reflection + A House!

So, yesterday was actually a crazy day! I received phone calls all day about getting a house next year, with 5 other girls. We've been looking for a while, and beginning to feel very stressed because we live in a small town, meaning houses are going like hot cakes! I got back to Uni at 4:30pm yesterday, and met my friend Emily, giving me 20 minutes to get a deposit sorted.. and we did it! We have a house for next year! I'm actually incredibly excited to be living in my own house next year, although I don't feel at 18 that I am remotely old enough to be doing this. 
I haven't really met the girls I'm living with, I only know my best friend here - Emily. The other 4 are on her course. In some respects, it's a little daunting, on the other hand, I'm really pleased about it. It means that at some points, I'll have the house all to myself. They will be in the same seminars/lectures and I'll have a completely different timetable. It may sound like I'm isolating myself but I like my own space, it allows me to breathe.
Although it sounds like a hectic day, all of the travelling allowed me to think. I had to drop a book off at my eating disorders clinic at home, yesterday morning. While I was there, I spoke to my psychologist who asked me how I was. I had already emailed her saying I would be coming in, and she'd asked me how I was doing. My reply stated that I'd put some weight on, and even though I'm nearing my goal weight, I am struggling to see how I'm actually better - the same anxiety towards food is there, so how would I ever manage to maintain?
When she saw me, she asked how I was again and just said 'Make sure you get the help you need and put yourself first.' Isn't that why I was there? 
I was a little annoyed but then began to realise, I'm doing this with or without her help anyway. Along with reading a fantastic blog from an amazing girl named Tanya, and a few texts from loved ones, and over an hour with someone I care about dearly, I am now beginning to think that the best treatment is the support from people you love. Prescribe me my friends for an hour and I'm much happier afterwards.. and ultimately, that's all that matters, right? 
The people who care about you, won't let you fall. You just have to trust them
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1 comment

melrose said...

That is so exciting! I love living in a house for that reason, I hope it will be good for you.
Yes the best support is who and what you surround yourself with. Sounds like a good and new chapter in you life.
Love you and my best wishes for your future xx

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