Monday, 7 May 2012

Big mistake

So, tonight I kind of told someone every detail of my current eating behaviour and now I think I've made a HUGE mistake. It's not that I have a problem unloading to this particular person, but I'm now fearful of what may happen next. Even though I know I need to either go back to my GP or be referred to an eating disorder specialist via my current source of help.. it doesn't mean I want to or am actually ready for it. I actually think this person will just go ahead and do that anyway.
I know she's only trying to help, and I know that I'm pretty much crying out for help, but I won't accept it. I just can't accept it. My next appointment is Tuesday - maybe if I just don't mention anything from now on, she'll forget? That is beyond optimistic! I could just be 'ill' next Tuesday? 

You know, this is why I keep things to myself. It only temporarily makes me feel better as now I'm panicking about what she's going to do!

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