Thursday, 22 March 2012

I'll only push you away

Every time I need to talk to someone, I cut off the people that care. Like last night, I really, really, really wanted to be cheered up by one person in particular. So, when they text me, any normal person would take the opportunity to tell them what's wrong - not me! I just tell them to have a good day, which is basically ending the conversation. Maybe I just think they're too busy to actually listen, or they don't actually care or that they just text me in the first place, because they thought they should.
I'd just rather not ruin their day and put a huge black cloud above their head. They have a life of their own and never come to me when they need help/advice, so why should I expect anything from them? I also know they won't have any answers and probably won't fully understand - so why bother explaining when I'll just be told 'cheer up, it'll be ok'. I can't do anything with that, and I can tell myself that which is probably why I choose to keep everything to myself. 
I also don't even know if I can trust them. I mean, the other day I was in the theatre when their partner asks what I'm going to study at university - I tell them Psychology.
'How ironic! You'll be your own case study'
Oh, thanks for that! That has really made me feel great. Maybe keeping things to yourself is the best option.

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